Tip 1: Why do we quarrel

Family and relationships

Tip 1: Why do we quarrel

Quarrels arise even between the closest people. No matter how much you love each other, no matter how you want to be together, you can not avoid disagreements. Knowing the main reasons for the quarrel will help you significantly reduce their number.

Instructions

The cause of quarrels can be banal fatigue friendfrom friend. Day after day you see the same person next to you, you know what and how he does, what you can expect from him, etc. Sooner or later all this will bore you, and dissatisfaction with the current situation is easiest to remove precisely in quarrels. You may not even know the true motives of your behavior.

Constant stress at work can be removed at homein the form of quarrels. You need to be able to get rid of the negative emotions that accumulate during the day. If you do not do this, you can not avoid constant quarrels. In no case will an innocent person be compelled to listen to completely groundless accusations. Ultimately, this can lead to more serious problems.

Sexual dissatisfaction can alsoplay a role. And this applies to both men and women. Sexual problems can be projected into other areas of a joint life, which increases the risk of quarrels.

Misunderstanding also appears when one of thepartners or even both are not ready to fulfill the new obligations that arise in the process of living together. A decisive role here can be played by fear, insecurity in yourself or your beloved person.

If expectations are not justified time after time,the soil for the emergence of quarrels is becoming more fertile. There is also a reverse situation, when expectations are too small. Then one of the parties feels somewhat restrained.

Quarrels can arise because of a lack of communication. The less you talk with each other and spend time together, the sooner there will be a misunderstanding. Try to see more often with your loved one, then many quarrels can be avoided.

Tip 2: How to ask a person and forget him

As they say, most often we quarrel with the mostclose and dear to us people. But is there any sense in these quarrels? As a rule, only they know us real, they saw us different, but they never ceased to love and accept what we are. On that they are considered close, because we trust them so much that they let us know so closely.

When parents quarrel - their children suffer, whenquarrel lovers - under the threat of their relationship. In any quarrel, you have to sacrifice something. And it's good if the person is important, not pride, because of which many can not apologize. There are many people who can not cross their principles and forgive the misdeed of a really important person.

As a result, they remain alone, alone with theirprinciples. It is impossible to say with certainty what motivates such people, the feeling of resentment, or maybe the inability to understand others? Certainly the principles are very important, but not always they must manage our actions. It is better to sacrifice them than man. Having checked this once, you can certainly make sure that you have done the right thing.

If so, the reward will not take longwait and a loved one will surround you with even greater care in gratitude for your forgiveness. And if not, and he will repeat his mistakes again, then you will understand which person is next to you.

Many know about this, but persevereclose in yourself and do not give a second chance to your beloved. Sometimes you should think not only about yourself, but about your chosen one. To understand why he did this, and most importantly, to talk with him about it. Many troubles due to the fact that people "do not know how to talk" with each other, but you need to be able to establish conflicts in this way.

Tip 3: Why do people quarrel over minor issues

Even between loving people is not excluded the appearancequarrel over trifles. But this does not mean that it's normal and innocuous to swear on trifles. Constant squabbles can spoil relations and kill love. If you do not want to allow this, identify the reasons for which you quarrel with your loved one for minor reasons.

The real reasons

At the heart of quarrels over trifles lie more serious,important reasons. And at heart, even the brawlers themselves realize this. It turns out that people swear on insignificant occasions instead of discussing real problems that they have in pairs. But whether they are doing the right thing by releasing steam, with little blood, is still a question. The lack of forgiveness, the lack of ability to give in, to compromise - these are often the reasons why people quarrel over trifles. Perhaps the pair is confronted at an unconscious level. One partner wants to prevail over another, to impose his own habits and rules on him. Such a position is not productive, as it can not lead to a positive result. Sometimes people use a minor trifle just as an excuse to break out on their loved ones. Bad mood, bad day, trouble at work, fatigue affects the individual, and he seeks a victim. Naturally, this does not justify the person. Not wishing to solve their problems or somehow relax, he self-affirms at the expense of a partner or partner.

Correct reaction

To maintain a relationship, it is important to realize,how small or, conversely, this or that topic of quarrel is significant. When you are ready to break up and tell the partner or partner for the un-dressed clothes or unwashed cup, stop and think whether this really matters to you. If the answer is yes, determine why. After all, the main thing is that you are both healthy and love each other, and trifles should not overshadow your happiness. Learn to accept a loved one as he is. This is not easy, but it is very important for a happy, long relationship. Understand that he may have other priorities, various shortcomings and bad habits. Do not try to remake your chosen one or your chosen one. Love not only the dignity of a loved one, but some shortcomings in his character. And in general, do not treat them as disadvantages, but treat them as features. If a loved one cares at you for trifles, do not start a quarrel. Try to smooth the situation and do not aggravate the situation. Remember, you are both equally responsible for what happens in your pair. When it comes to the discord on an insignificant occasion, the one who started the quarrel and the one who did not stop it is to blame. Do not be frivolous about such misunderstandings. Each of the proceedings over trifles leaves a mark on your relationship.

Tip 4: How often does the couple quarrel?

Experts of the company eSure compiled and published statistical data, from which it appears that the average married couple quarrel more than five times a day. For the year it is approximately 2450 times.

"The wrangling on an everyday basis ispart of healthy, normal family relationships, "Nikki Sellers (head of the company) told reporters. - The survey showed that 3,000 people were involved in civil or official marriages, that scandals often happen-for a day, five to seven times each. "So why do the spouses quarrel so often?" The issue of the distribution of money is often an apple of contention especially with family budgets, where the incomes of both spouses are combined.) Another common cause of bickering is the unwillingness of one or both to perform boring homework.Charmony in marriage is violated by the preference of certain programs on TV, rap at night and daily menyu.Suprugi about 90 times a year find out the relationship because of the upbringing of their children. With the same frequency, they quarrel because of dissatisfaction with sex life.